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Daffynitions and twisted words
(Arranged alphabetically)
Select the letter that you want to look at:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z |
Babble: Cross between a sheep and a male cow.
Baby-sitter: A teenager acting like an adult, while the adults are out acting like teenagers.
Baby: Nine months interest on a small deposit.
Baby: A honey-gathering insect which lives around San Francisco.
Bach Chorale : The place behind the barn where you keep the horses.
Bachelor: A man who leans toward women, but not far enough to altar his stance.
Bachelor: A man who never has a bride idea.
Bachelor: An unaltered male.
Bachelor: Unaltered male.
Backdrop: a button-down trap on the rear of long underwear.
Backfire: In primitive religious rites, the act of pouring gasoline on and touching a match to the seat of someone's trousers.
Backslide: Going down a hill face up in the prone position.
Backwash: What the nurse gives you in the hospital.
Bacon: "I'm BACON a cake for the pot luck dinner?"
Bad shopper: Ocean.
Bagel: A doughnut with rigor mortis.
Baiting: Another SF bell.
Baker: Hot dog with bread.
Bald: "When I heard about the accident, I BALD all night."
Balderdash: Short race for guy with thin hair
Ball Joint: Men's penitentiary
Balloon: Crazy sheep.
Balming: Round Chinese vase.
Balsam: Cry a little
Banana: Anna has bad team spirit. I want to BANANA from the team
Band: prohibited or forbidden.
Bandana : The Fashion Industry rallied strongly behind BANDANA.
Bandolier: The barbarians saw the women and turned into a BANDOLIER.
Bangladesh: When a frustrated driver hits the dashboard with his fist
Banker: Dog with money.
Banking: Explosives expert.
Banking: What the Declaration of Independence did.
Banquet: When it rained on Washington Mutual
Bar Exam: A test to determine just how much you can hold.
Bar mirror: A tic bell.
Barbells: Pretty young ladies who like to hang out in saloons
Barbeque: A woman buys the groceries, washes the lettuce, chops the tomatoes, dices the onions, marinates the meat, and cleans everything up ... but the man "made the dinner.
Barbeque: The act of affixing sharp projections to the sides of your pool stick.
Barcarole: Song sung in a pub at Christmas time.
Barcarole: song sung in a saloon at Christmas time.
Barfor: Thrown up glove.
Bargain: Money made from selling a saloon.
Baritone: Note emanating from Sen. Goldwater, or from singer Manilow, for example.
Barium: No matter how many bones I give Fido, he will go BARIUM..
Barking: Alcohol king.
Barking: Canine king.
Barking: Lawyer king.
Barking: Prison king.
Barometer: I didn't meet her at the BAROMETER at the grocery store.
Barroom: My neighbor's new motorcycle goes BARROOM loudly when he starts it up.
Baseball Bat: Fly swatter.
Baseball: A busines$ that can't thrive without strikes
Basheba: Two female sheep for ewe!
Bashful: Being harsh or abusive toward someone
Basing: SF songs.
Basing: Singing wolves and military bases.
Baster: Equine one drinks the sex.
Basting: Bee or bell in SF.
Bathinette: What you wear over your hair while bathing.
Bathing Suit: A female garment cut to see level.
Battalion: Group of warrior lions.
Batty: Tea drunk by flying mammals.
Batty: Tea that makes one an insane flying mammal.
BBS: Tall tales of telecomputing told by insects that produce honey.
Beacon: Become a jail inmate
Beacon: One walking equine spins rudder knight.
Beaming: Chinese vase floathsome on the ranger.
Beaming: Honey producing vase.
Beaming: Irish bird.
Beaming: Play tea.
Beasty: Tea that turns people into animal.
Beaten: Pelted by a red, root vegetable.
Beautician: A dyeing breed
Becalm: Insect settles down after being angry
Bedlam: A fast or a sink.
Bedlam: Loud sleep.
Bedpan: To have an affair with a man who never grew up.
Bedrock: A popular dance performed while lying down.
Beef up classrooms: Better education for cows.
Beef Wore: Bovine prostitutes.
Beldam: Loud sleep.
Beleaguer: One step below little league.
Beleaguered: Stuck in the semipros.
Belgium: A ringing jewel.
Bellhop: A dangerous game played by children in the church bell tower.
Bellicose: dancing with your stomachs together.
Bellicose: You shouldn't hit someone in the BELLICOSE it hurts.
Belling: Baby bell.
Belong: The largest insect in the hive lengthwise, usually the Queen
Belong: To take your time.
Belting:Musical Chinese.
Ben Ding: Chinese bow.
Bench press: Reporters in the Gallery
Benefactor: "That little hop might have BENEFACTOR in her losing the gold."
Benefactor: His fasting for a day before the fight might have BENEFACTOR in his being knocked out.
Benignly: Kind Korean bee #9.
Berate: Grading honey producers.
Berate: The price given to the second teer of customers who do not qualify for the A rate.
Beriberi: A double funeral
Beseech: BESEECH you when they sting.
Bestowing: Bird with wings soaked in gravy.
Betting: Gambling bell.
Betwixt: Bee in the middle.
Beware: "I asked the man at the employment office, is this BEWARE I find me a job?"
Bias: Cars go rapidly BIAS when we go 40 mph on the freeway.
Bias: If we're good, Dad will BIAS ice cream before we go home.
Bias: Purchase a donkey.
Bias: Purchase time with a hooker.
Bias: Why men go to a brothel
Biased: Having two bottoms
Bible: Purchasing a male bovine creature.
Big time: A very large clock.
Bigamy: "Don't you agree it was BIGAMY to let her borrow my video games."
Bigamy: Jack said "I thought it was BIGAMY to make so many women happy."
Bigamy: The only crime on the books where two rites make a wrong.
Biker: Farewell to a dog.
Biker: Gay dog.
Biking: A gay monarch.
Bilious: "Here's a check for the down payment. Please BILIOUS for the balance."
Bilious: as in, "We'll take delivery now and then you can BILIOUS."
Bim Truening wrote:
Biology: Study of shopping habits
Biplane: The advice I got from my mother on purchasing underwear
Biplane: To purchase an aircraft
Biplane: What a hijacker says while triggering an explosion.
Bipolar: Farewell to the Arctic.
Bird Watcher: A person who likes to watch fowl play.
Bisexual: purchasing favors.
Bison: Male cow.
Bison: My son is gay!
Bison: What you cook a podding in.
Bison: what you say to your male offspring when leaving for work
Biting: Homosexual bell.
Biting: Purchase a bell.
Biting: Toothy bell.
Bitter: "He BITTER because she was teasing him"
Bitty: Tea of small computer files.
Bivalves: A guy took a thousand clams from his bank account? He planned to use the money to BIVALVES.
Blackmail: Masculine member of the Negro race.
Blaming: Accusative vase.
Blind date: a companion who has drunk too much and has to be taken home.
Blouse -- 'Tis an ill wind that BLOUSE nobody any good.
Blowing: A windy bird.
Blowing: Horny bird.
Blowing: Jet powered bird.
Blowing: Windy
Blowing: Windy bird.
Blue jeans: Very depressed chromosomes
Blue jeans: Very depressed chromosomes.
Blunderbuss: A mistaken kiss.
Bobby Socks: Blows delivered by a London Policeman.
Bobby Socks: What British policemen wear on their feet.
Boiling: Baby boil.
Boisterous: "They may appear to be mature to you but they are still BOISTEROUS"
Bold: "Have you ever BOLD a 300 game?"
Bolting: King sheep.
Bolting: Musical bolt.
Bombay: Dropping explosives on the waters surrounding San Francisco.
Bonaparte: One piece separated from the rest of the skeleton
Booby trap: when you notice a girl's chest and end up getting married.
Bookkeepers: A problem for libraries.
Bookkeeping: the practice of never returning library books.
Boomerang: "It's up to you," said the pirate. "You can either jump off the BOOMERANG.
Booming: Loud vase.
Booting: Chinesses door.
Booting: Cleans.
Booze: "When Cobey had the ball, the cheers drowned out the BOOZE."
Bordello: A lackadaisical greeting by service industry workers.
Boron: Miners, let's BORON until we strike gold!
Boss: A person who's always early when you're late and always late when you're early.
Bosun: Decoration on a star.
Bottom: Tom underground.
Bounty: Tea that makes you jump.
Bowing: A bird paying its respects to the King.
Bowleg: Leg decoration.
Bowline: Line of arrow firing equipment.
Bowling: Baby bowl.
Boxer Shorts: Film clips of famous pugilists.
Boycott: Male bed.
Boycott: Where a male kid sleeps.
Bra: A lift without a letdown
Bracing: Singing donkeys.
Braggart: someone who always puts his feats in his mouth
Braid: How the donkey made noise.
Brake Fluid: Coffee
Braking: Chine.
Braking: King of donkeys.
Bravery: Where warriors congregate.
Breastplate: the film taken out of the x-ray unit by the mammographer.
Brief Survey: Deciding which pair of shorts to wear on your big date
Broken: Yo, BROKEN you tell me which way to the concert?
Broker: A man who runs your fortune into a shoestring.
Brothel: This BROTHEL help you sleep tonight.
Brussels Sprout: A small Belgian child.
Brutalize: Lies told to get us into Iraq.
BT: Buzzing tea.
Buccaneer: high cost of corn
Buckboard: The price of lumber before inflation.
Bucker: $1 dog.
Buckshot: A wasted dollar
Buckshot: Another dollar wasted
Buddhah: The fans BUDDHAH long time after he made that error that let in the winning run."
Budget: It's stuck so tight I can't even BUDGET.
Budget: What you can't do to a politicians mind after he's made it up.
Builder: Asked her for payment
Bullrush: Fast bull.
Bullwrinkle: Old bull.
Bummer: Unkept ocean.
Bumming: Unkempt vase.
Bumming: Unkept Chinese vase.
Bumper: Price of a homeless person.
Bumping: Unkept bell.
Bungalows: Used to hang criminal pastries.
Bunion: Charged pastry
Bunting: Musical pastry.
Buoyancy: Take the BUOYANCY if he can hit a curve ball.
Burrowing: Small flying donkey.
Bursting: Over full bell.
Busby: Apine mass transit.
Busting: Mass transit bell.
Busting: Mass transit for bells.
Bustle: The rush-hour BUSTLE be late.
Bustline: the people waiting to get off the bus.
Button: 2,000 lb ass.
Buying: Homosexual Chinese.
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